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Doctor On Her Doorstep
Annie Claydon


The stranger who loves her. Jenna’s spent her life being overlooked, so when she arrives home to find an unbelievably gorgeous man on her doorstep she assumes he’s looking for someone else. But Dr Adam Sinclair is here for her – this delectable stranger is her new lodger!Wrestling with emotional wounds from his past, Adam doesn’t expect to find himself so sharply drawn to his beautiful, guarded landlady. Floored by her compassion, he feels the barricades around his heart crumbling. Yet even now, allowing Jenna into his heart might be the hardest thing he’s ever done…










If she’d stayed still, quiet, then maybe he could have resisted her.

But he felt her fingers on his jaw, gently brushing the night’s stubble. Then she whispered his name and ripped every last thread of his resolve to tatters. His hands found her waist and she slid onto his lap. He kissed her, heat banking and flaring in his chest until his head began to swim.

If the first kiss could be explained away as a heat of the moment thing, the second trashed that particular excuse. They both knew exactly what they were doing. Her gaze was locked with his and he heard her murmur his name, felt her lips against his in a smile.

Adam poured everything he had, everything he was into the kiss, letting the long, slow beat of their passion take him.


Dear Reader

When I was planning this book, one of the things I pondered long and hard was where to set it. I wanted somewhere exciting, interesting, possibly a little challenging. Romantic, definitely. And although I’ve been to many places that would answer that description exactly, none of them quite seemed to fit the bill as the backdrop for this story.

The answer turned out to be in the very last place that I thought of looking: quite literally, right on my doorstep.

Like many big cities, London is a place of shifting populations. People come from all over the world—as tourists, to study, or to work—and Dr Adam Marshall is one of those people. He’s in London for a month, and soon he’ll be moving on.

Dr Jenna Weston knows just what it’s like to be left behind. She’s promised herself that she’s not going to allow her future to follow the pattern of her past, and that if she opens her heart again it’s going to be to someone who’ll stay with her. So right from the start Adam’s completely wrong for Jenna—despite the fact that his good looks and charm set her pulse racing.

Thank you for sharing Adam and Jenna’s story with me. I loved writing it, and I hope you enjoy reading it. I’m always delighted to hear from readers, and you can e-mail me via my website at www.annieclaydon.com

Annie




About the Author


Cursed from an early age with a poor sense of direction and a propensity to read, ANNIE CLAYDON spent much of her childhood lost in books. After completing her degree in English Literature, she indulged her love of romantic fiction and spent a long, hot summer writing a book of her own. It was duly rejected and life took over, with a series of U-turns leading in the unlikely direction of a career in computing and information technology. The lure of the printed page proved too much to bear, though and she now has the perfect outlet for the stories which have always run through her head, writing Medical


Romance for Mills and Boon. Living in London, a city where getting lost can be a joy, she has no regrets about having taken her time in working her way back to the place she started from.

Why not check out Annie’s fantastic debut?

ALL SHE WANTS FOR CHRISTMAS

Also available in eBook formatfrom www.millsandboon.co.uk


Doctor on

Her Doorstep



Annie Claydon
















www.millsandboon.co.uk (http://www.millsandboon.co.uk)


There are so many people to thank.

My family and friends, who believed in me

with such certainty that sometimes I feared for their

sanity. The talented and lovely Medical Romance

writers, who have welcomed this new recruit to

their ranks with such warmth and kindness.

And last (but not least) the editorial team at

Harlequin Mills & Boon, especially Lucy Gilmour, who

has guided me with insight, patience and good humour

every step of the way. My heartfelt thanks to you all.




CHAPTER ONE


JENNA had been longing for this moment. She slid her car into the parking space outside the rambling Victorian house that had once been her family home and killed the ignition. A shower and a pizza were waiting for her inside and nothing now stood between her and the solitary, relaxing evening she had promised herself.

There was something, though. Someone to be more precise, and he was sitting on the steps, in the shade of the wide arch of the porch, his elbows propped on his knees, legs stretched out in front of him. His demeanour said he was waiting for someone, and since that someone was unlikely to be her, he must be another of Janice’s endless stream of boyfriends.

It was a shame, but she couldn’t do anything about it. Janice had moved out of the ground-floor flat three weeks ago, and if she hadn’t seen fit to share her forwarding address with him, then Jenna certainly wouldn’t. The best she could do for him was to take a contact number and promise to pass it on.

Okay. This won’t take long. Pity really. She didn’t like giving people the brush-off and there was something about his relaxed pose that said he was someone you’d like to spend time with. Jenna hauled the two heavy shopping bags out of the boot of her car and manoeuvred her way through the front gate, kicking it closed behind her, rather harder than she had meant to. The low sun dazzled her, and she was halfway down the front path before she could get a proper look at the stranger.

He looked like a rock star. Distressed leather jacket, jeans and boots. Light brown hair streaked with gold, which was just long enough to slick behind his ears, and the kind of tan you didn’t get from a two-week Easter break. His eyes were hidden behind dark glasses but the tilt of his head indicated that he was watching Jenna as she walked towards him and dumped her shopping bags at his feet.

�Hello. Can I help you?’

�I’m looking for Dr Weston.’

�Oh! That’s me.’ Something crawled up Jenna’s spine, and she wondered whether a bug had got into her shirt. A bug that was somehow making her fingertips tingle as well.

�I’m Adam Sinclair. Dr Greene told me he’d mentioned my name to you.’ His accent was English, but he’d obviously been in America for a while. Mid-Atlantic. Rolling between the familiar, cut-glass consonants of home and a heart-stopping drawl.

�He said …’ Jenna gulped back the words. It wasn’t tactful to repeat what Rob Greene had said in his email. �I thought you weren’t going to arrive until next weekend.’ Jenna’s reflection stared back at her from the dark lenses of his glasses.

He seemed to realise that the sunglasses were unnerving her and he pulled them off, hooking them into the open neck of his shirt. �I flew in from America this morning, and I’m driving down to Exeter tonight for the week. I thought I’d swing by and try to see you on the way.’

His tawny gaze looked as if it had been kissed by the same sun as his hair and was a hundred times more unsettling. Jenna fixed her eyes on a point somewhere between the bridge of his nose and his hairline and issued a mental instruction to pull herself together. �That’s something of a detour. North London’s not exactly on the way from Heathrow to the M3.’

�Well, I did say swing. Implies an arc.’ He shrugged off the twenty miles of crowded roads as if they were a minor obstacle. �Is there a problem?’

�No.’ Jenna didn’t move. It wasn’t really a problem. He just wasn’t quite what she’d been expecting. To be absolutely honest, she wouldn’t have known how to expect someone like this, appearing out of nowhere, on her doorstep.

�I should show you some ID.’ He’d mistaken her bewilderment for mistrust, and pulling his wallet out of his jacket pocket he opened it and handed it to her. Credit cards. A Florida driving licence. A photograph of a woman. Jenna closed the wallet and handed it back.

�Thanks.’ She reached for her bags of shopping, but he got there first, picking them up as he got to his feet. �You’d better come inside.’

Adam followed her up the stairs to her flat in silence, keeping his distance as she opened her front door and waiting for her to motion him in. He followed her through to the kitchen and put her bags onto the counter.

�I’ll just put my shopping away, and then show you the flat.’ Jenna threw her keys down on the countertop and slipped out of her jacket, rolling up the cuffs of the plain white shirt she wore underneath. �Would you like a cup of tea?’

�Tea would be nice, thanks.’ He had retreated back to stand in the doorway, obviously intent on not crowding her. �I’m getting the feeling that I’m not quite what you expected.’

He could say that again. �Well, actually, I somehow got the idea that you were a woman from Rob’s email. But it makes no difference.’

There was a whole world of difference in the wry grin that melted his chiselled good looks. No medical doctor had any business even being in possession of a smile like that, let alone using it.

�Ah. Sorry about that. If you’d prefer not …’

�It’s not a problem. Rob does tend to write as if he’s being charged by the word.’ Rob’s characteristically staccato email had, as usual, provided more questions than answers. Travelling alone, concerns about hotel. Security and quiet needed. Speak on return from hols. Rob wasn’t back for another week and in the meantime Jenna had jumped to the conclusion that Dr Sinclair was a woman.

�Yeah. When Ellie was born he emailed me a photo of her and Cassie, and wrote “7 lbs. Beautiful” underneath. I sent him a text demanding details and he replied “Girl”.’

Jenna snorted with laughter. �He sent you a photo? You were honoured, most of us just got “Born” with a couple of exclamation marks. You’ve known Rob a while, then, as Ellie’s nearly five.’

�Ever since med school. Ellie was born just after I went abroad.’ He gave her a confiding grin and Jenna hung on to the countertop for support. �If it wasn’t for Cassie I’d never know what he was up to, though. She sends photos, letters. Even had a copy made of that drawing they have in their sitting room of Ellie and Daisy.’

He was clearly aware that she was alone in the house, and was trying to drop as many reassuring details into the conversation as he could. By chance, the reference turned out to be particularly appropriate. �That sketch is one of mine. Cassie asked me to do a second copy for a friend who was overseas.’ Someone who was going through a tough time, Cassie had said.

Laughter escaped his studied reserve. �Really? That drawing is remarkable, I have it hung in my study at home. It always makes me smile.’

It was only a pencil sketch. Jenna had been pleased with how it had turned out, but it was nothing all that special. He seemed to want to say more, but she cut him short before he got the chance. �I hear Florida’s a beautiful part of the world. What do you do there?’ Jenna opened the refrigerator and started to stack her shopping away.

�I’m a plastic surgeon.’

So this was the image that sold nose jobs and liposuction to the rich, was it? Adam probably did pretty well out of it. Jenna reckoned that a good percentage of the female population would go through hell, high water and even general anaesthesia to see approval in Adam Sinclair’s face.

Taking advantage of the fact that the open fridge door hid her from him, Jenna rolled her eyes. �And that’s what you’re going to be lecturing on?’

�Yes. I was looking to spend some time back in the UK and when I got the offer of a month here as a visiting lecturer, I jumped at it. I’m spending a week visiting family, and I’ll be back here on Sunday week for my first lecture.’

�On a Sunday? It’s a public lecture, then.’ Not that she was even vaguely interested.

�Yeah. Three o’clock in the Fleming Lecture Theatre.’

He didn’t invite her to come, and Jenna didn’t express any interest in doing so. Instead, she straightened up, flashing him a brisk smile. �I’ll make the tea and take you downstairs to see the flat.’ Perhaps she’d been too harsh in judging him. Okay, so Adam wasn’t a woman. That was hardly his fault, neither was it a crime, although that smile of his ought to be kept under house arrest. If he chose to use his talents and an expensive education to carry out largely unnecessary surgery, that was a matter for his own conscience. He was what he was.

As a sign of penitence she picked up a packet of chocolate biscuits, along with her mug and the keys to the ground-floor flat, before leading him down the stairs. �I’ve just had the walls done, and it stinks of paint at the moment, but it’ll air out by next week.’

�That’s fine. I just want somewhere to stay. Rob offered to put me up, but with two children and another one on the way he doesn’t have the room. And I don’t like hotels much.’

�No. Rob mentioned that.’ Jenna led the way into the lounge and plumped herself down on the dust sheet that covered the sofa.

�He did?’ The look he shot her was half-wary. Three-quarters guilty.

�In passing. I don’t much like hotels either.’ It wasn’t her business. Jenna reached for the biscuits as a change of subject, opening the packet and offering him one. �Why don’t you take a look around? There isn’t much furniture, I’m afraid, just the basics.’

�That’s what I like about it.’ He ignored the biscuits and walked over to the window, drawing the shutters back to let the evening sun spill into the room, slanting across the walls and floor. �And there’s plenty of light.’ He turned to Jenna. �This will be fine, if that’s okay with you.’

�Don’t you want to look at the rest?’

�Should I?’ He gave her a quizzical look, and Jenna felt the back of her neck begin to burn.

�It’s the usual practice. I’ll stay here if you don’t mind.’ She felt awkward under his gaze, the way the corners of his mouth twitched slightly when he looked at her spare frame and her dark red hair, scraped back off her face and secured tightly at the back of her head. His profession, and those smouldering tawny eyes, seemed to make a constant, unspoken judgement of her.

�So you’re not going to come with me and point out the finer features of the property?’

�No, I take a relaxed approach. Drink tea and let you show yourself around.’

He chuckled. �Fine. I can take a hint.’ He disappeared out into the hallway, the sound of his footsteps indicating his progress around the flat. He was back again almost before she could extract a second biscuit from the packet. �One of the doors is locked.’

�Ah, yes. That’s the second bedroom. My last tenant went to Spain to work and she’s left some of her stuff here for me to send on when she gets settled. I can clear the boxes out if you want that room, but the main bedroom’s through here.’ Jenna led him the full length of the hallway and opened the door.

He strode inside and looked around. �Big room.’ He sat down on the bed. �Decent mattress. That’s a real bonus.’

�I think you’ll find that’s my line. As I’m here, I’ll also point out that there’s plenty of cupboard space.’

�Which would be my cue to look inside.’

�Absolutely. Let me know if you find any skeletons. I don’t think Janice left any behind, but you never can be sure.’

Adam opened the doors wide, inspecting the interior of the wardrobe. The smile that was playing around his lips broadened when Jenna jumped as he flinched back suddenly. �Nope. She must have taken them all with her.’

�Well, that’s a relief.’ Jenna brushed a few crumbs from the front of her shirt. �What do you think, then?’



His eyes travelled around the bedroom. �May I see the other room, please? The one that’s locked.’

�Of course.’ Jenna led the way down the hallway. �This room’s a little smaller and there isn’t so much cupboard space. I like it better, though, there are doors out on to the patio and you get the early morning sun.’ Most tenants preferred the extra cupboard space.

The soft leather of his jacket brushed against her arm as he walked past her into the room. �I like it too. Would it be okay if I swapped the boxes over to the main bedroom and brought the bed through here?’

Jenna shrugged. �I’ll do that some time next week for you.’

He shook his head. �No. I’ll do it.’ He didn’t wait for her answer and turned to walk over to the French doors, staring out into the garden. �Big garden. What’s the area at the end there that’s attracting the butterflies?’

Her beloved butterfly garden. Jenna was both pleased and slightly embarrassed that he’d noticed it. �That’s part of the garden too. My grandfather and I planted it when I was little. There are herbs and shrubs to attract the butterflies, but it’s getting a bit out of control now.’

�So this was your family home?’

�Yes. It was my grandparents’ house. I split it into two flats after they died. I was a student then and the income came in handy.’ He nodded as if he understood, but there was no way that he could have done. Jenna herself didn’t fully understand what had happened with her parents.

�You lived with your grandparents?’

�Yes, I’ve lived here since I was ten.’

He said nothing. Jenna began to wish that either she’d not said so much or that he would question her more. Anything but this half-story, which he seemed to accept so unquestioningly. Or maybe it wasn’t acceptance. Maybe he simply didn’t care.

Adam turned away from the window and followed her through to the sitting room. �So, do we get to haggle over the rent now?’

She’d rather he didn’t. That way he had of quirking his eyebrow gave him an unfair advantage. �It’s seven hundred for the month. I’ll stock the fridge up for you.’

�You will not. Seven hundred pounds is daylight robbery, this place is worth twice that. I may have been away for a while, but I haven’t lost touch with London property prices.’

�I keep the rent low so I can pick and choose who I have here. Anyway, you can’t haggle upwards.’

�Why not?’ He lifted one eyebrow.

�You just can’t. I won’t have it.’

He held up his hands in a gesture of surrender. �Okay. Done.’ Adam reached into his jacket and brought out his wallet. �Would you like a deposit?’

�Not particularly. The place is empty anyway.’

�Fair enough.’ He picked his mug of tea up from the coffee table and took a final swig. �I’d better get back on the road, then, and leave you to get on with your supper.’

Jenna flushed. He’d noticed that she was already on her third chocolate biscuit and was regarding the packet pointedly. So what? She was on her feet all day in a busy A and E department, not sitting in a leather chair behind a swanky desk, and she worked up an appetite. And she might not have curves, but at least her figure owed nothing to silicone. �Thanks. I’ll see you in a week’s time, then.’




CHAPTER TWO


SUNDAY morning. Ten-thirty. Jenna should have been drinking tea and reading the paper, but instead she was studying the street outside. A car drew up and she twitched the muslin curtains back into place, stepping away from the big bay windows.

The bell sounded when she was halfway down the stairs. As soon as she opened the door, a four-year-old bundle of energy launched itself at her.

�Hello, Ellie. Did you have a nice holiday?’ She nodded at Rob and crooked her finger at him. �Come in. You’ve got some explaining to do.’

Nothing was going to dent Rob’s good humour this morning or dim the violent hue of his Cornwall Surfers T-shirt. He followed Jenna up the stairs, replying indulgently to Ellie’s chatter, and flung himself into an armchair while Jenna fetched some juice, a pad of paper and a box of assorted pencils and crayons for Ellie.

�Don’t give her that pad, Jen. She’ll only make a mess of it.’ Rob was looking at the thick, white cartridge paper that Jenna had put in front of Ellie.

Jenna nodded at Ellie, who was smoothing her hand across the pad. �You’re never too young to be able to appreciate the texture of nice paper.’ She bent and tore one of the thick sheets from the pad, clipping it on to a board for Ellie, and selected a soft pencil from the box. �Here you are, sweetie, try using this.’

Rob rolled his eyes. �Well, if she turns out to be the next Picasso, then I suppose we’ll have you to thank. Look, sorry about the mix-up last week.’

�We managed.’ Jenna walked through to the kitchen to make some tea and Rob followed her. �You might have told me, though.’

�Well, it’s a bit tricksy, you know how these things are.’

�No, not really, not until you tell me.’

�Okay, well, Adam’s a decent bloke. One of the best people I’ve ever known, in fact, but he’s not had it easy these last eighteen months. I’ve been trying to find him somewhere to stay where he can have some peace and quiet, get back on his feet.’ Rob shrugged. �Tactfully, you know?’

Rob was no good at tact, he usually left that kind of thing to Cassie. �Which explains all that cloak-and-dagger stuff in your email.’

�Yeah.’ Rob brightened. �Yeah, that’s it.’ It wasn’t it at all. There was a whole list of other questions that sprang to mind.

�So he’s not staying with you and Cass?’

�No. We offered, of course, but he says that we’ve no room. And what with Cass being pregnant and everything …’ They both jumped as the doorbell went. If that was Adam, he was early.

�Can you get the intercom?’ Jenna reached up into the kitchen cabinet for another cup. �And don’t worry. He’ll be fine here, and I’ll keep an eye on him.’

�Thanks, Jen.’

Rob disappeared out of the kitchen and Jenna gave the teapot a swirl, even though she’d already done so once, and dumped it down on the tray. It would have helped if she knew what on earth she was meant to be keeping an eye out for, but Cassie would be a much better bet than Rob when it came to straight answers.

The commotion in the hallway indicated that the object of her speculation had arrived and that he was being greeted by both Ellie and her father at the same time, the child squealing with laughter and demanding a hug.

Jenna popped her head around the kitchen doorway. He was a picture of health and good humour, tanned, taller and broader than Rob and grinning as he lifted Ellie up so she could fling her arms around his neck. No trace of whatever it was that Rob was so concerned about.

�Hello, there.’ His head jerked upwards as Jenna spoke.

�Hi.’ He came forward, still carrying Ellie, who looked as if she was going to have to be prised away from him with a crowbar. �I hope we’re not crashing in on your morning.’

�Not at all. Welcome back.’ She held her hand out to him, and he took it, his touch cool, measured. He seemed to be less careful about keeping his distance now that he was not alone with her, and held on to her hand for one moment too long before Jenna pulled hers back again.

�Where is my present?’ Ellie was demanding now, beating her hands against his shoulders.

�In a minute, honey. We’ll just collect the keys from Jenna and get out of her hair first.’ He was smooth, she’d give him that. Perfect poise. Nothing but easy charm.

�I’ve just made tea.’ Jenna waved him into the sitting room. �And Ellie’s been doing some drawing, I expect you’ll be wanting to see that. Let her open her present here if she’d like to.’

When she brought the tea in, Ellie was already working on the package that Adam had given her. Pink paper on the outside, a pretty bow and layer upon layer of paper underneath, firmly bound with sticky tape.

�Hope it lives up to all this anticipation.’ Rob was making no move to help his daughter as she whooped with delighted frustration, trying to rip the parcel open.

�Me, too.’ Adam too was letting Ellie get on with the task of unwrapping her present unaided. �So how was the holiday? Catch any waves?’

�Fabulous. We were on the north coast, and the hotel was close to this great little surf beach, so I could go out first thing in the morning and make it back in time for breakfast.’

�Nice one. You’ll have to come back to Florida soon.’ Adam accepted a mug of tea from Jenna, taking a grateful sip.

�We will. You can sit on the beach with Cassie and the kids and I’ll show you how it’s done.’

�Yeah, right, in your dreams.’ He shot a bright grin at Jenna. �Takes more than a hideous T-shirt to make a surfer. What was Cassie thinking, letting you go out in that?’

Rob laughed. �She reckons that if I go out in it then she won’t have to put up with it around the house.’ He ran his hand over the garishly coloured fabric. �What, don’t you like it?’

Ellie’s delighted squeal meant that Adam never did get to deliver his verdict. She’d reached the inside of the package and was holding up a string of beads.

�Aren’t they pretty?’ Ellie brought the beads to Jenna to show her and when she examined them carefully she could see they were hand painted, each one different.

�I got them in Mexico.’ Adam watched as Jenna carefully wound the beads around Ellie’s neck for her, nodding with approval. �You look beautiful, honey.’

Ellie was climbing up on the sofa, between Adam and Rob, to catch a glimpse of herself in the mirror over the fireplace, and Rob tugged at her sleeve. �What else have you got, then, El?’ He gestured to the folded fabric that still lay amongst the ruins of the wrapping paper.

Ellie pulled the fabric out, turned it around a couple of times then held it up against herself, and Jenna caught a glimpse of colourful embroidery on a white cotton background.

�It’s a bit big, isn’t it, mate?’ Rob was surveying his daughter. �She’ll be sixteen before she grows into that.’

�No, idiot. It’s a dress.’ Jenna smoothed the fabric and held it against Ellie. It was roomy, but the drawstring at the waist meant that it could be adjusted to fit her perfectly.

�Can I wear it?’ Ellie was jumping up and down with excitement.

�Not until you’ve said the magic word.’ Rob smiled at her.

Ellie launched herself at Adam, nearly knocking his tea over and flung her arms around his neck, kissing his cheek. �Oh, that’s nice … Can I have another one? Right here?’ His finger was on his other cheek and Ellie obliged eagerly. �Thank you.’

�I drew you a picture.’ Ellie’s hands were on Adam’s shoulder, pulling as hard as she could, and Jenna saw alarm flare in Rob’s face.

�Gently, El. Adam’s shoulder isn’t properly mended yet.’

Adam waved him away. �I’d love to see your picture, Ellie, will you show me?’

Ellie fetched her drawing and climbed up onto Adam’s knee. �That’s Mum … and Dad … me and Daisy … and that’s you.’ Her finger was moving across the paper.

�That’s very good. And who’s this, up there?’

Ellie shook her head, as if the stupidity of adults never ceased to amaze her. �That’s your friend. Mum says she’s in heaven.’

Rob’s face tightened, but Adam’s smile never faltered. �That’s lovely, honey. I’m so pleased you drew her too, along with the rest of us.’

�Will you tell her?’

�Ellie …’ There was a note of anxiety in Rob’s voice but Adam’s glance quieted him.

�Of course I’ll tell her. She’ll be so happy, I expect she’ll tell all her friends up there.’

Ellie glared up at the ceiling and nodded, as if satisfied. �Can I wear my dress?’

This time Adam allowed Rob to step in. �Not yet, El. We’ve got some things to move around downstairs and I don’t want you getting it all dirty. Later on, when we’ve finished.’

The circular face that Ellie had drawn, giving no hint of who Adam’s friend might really be, released its grip on Jenna’s attention and she bumped back down to earth. �Oh, no, that’s okay, I already did that.’

Adam’s gaze was on her now, so palpable that it almost tickled her skin. �You did what?’

�I moved the boxes and the bed. And put a few things in the fridge, just essentials, to keep you going until tomorrow.’

His eyes slid down her thin bare arms, and her fingers jerked in her lap. �On your own? I thought I said I’d do that.’

Rob came to her rescue. Kind of. �What I love about this woman is that you can say anything you like to her, and she’ll hear you, but she won’t listen. Eh, Jen?’

Adam pursed his lips thoughtfully. �In that case, perhaps I can just put my bag downstairs and take you all to lunch before my lecture.’ He glanced at Ellie, his face breaking into a smile. �Go and ask your dad if you can wear your new dress.’

The dress fitted perfectly. Adam and Rob had disappeared downstairs with the keys, while Jenna stripped off Ellie’s jeans and T-shirt and drew the dress over her head, running her fingers over the hand embroidery and arranging it just so.

�Can I have some perfume?’ Ellie was obviously keen on playing the lady.

�No, you know what your mum says about perfume.’ Ellie’s idea of a dab behind her ears was to tip half a bottle of Cassie’s anniversary gift over her head. �Tell you what, this is much better.’

She trimmed a couple of stalks of lavender from the bunch in the fireplace and tied them firmly with a ribbon from the drawer. �Here, I’ll fix it onto your dress … like this … and you’ll smell nice and look nice as well.’ She leaned back and admired her handiwork. Ellie looked beautiful.

�Are you going to dress up, too?’ Ellie had unpinned Jenna’s hair and was arranging it around her shoulders.

�No, I’m fine as I am.’ Jenna looked down at her jeans and cotton, sleeveless top. This was about as good as it got, and however much she wanted to make an effort to look nice today she wasn’t going to do anything that might betray that to either Rob or Adam.

�Perfect.’ Adam’s voice boomed behind her and she jumped. He obviously meant Ellie.

�Doesn’t she look pretty?’ She flashed a smile at him.

�Yes, she looks perfect, too.’ His mouth twisted in a smile as Jenna flushed. �Thank you for the flowers.’

She’d arranged lavender and sweet-smelling greenery in a vase, putting it downstairs in the hearth to break up the stark, white walls and bring a little of the garden into the flat. And he’d noticed them. �They’re not really flowers.’

He shrugged. �Thanks anyway. You have a good eye, they look stunning.’ He ignored the redness, which was now spreading across her cheeks, and turned his attention to Ellie. �And you look like a proper young lady.’

Ellie seemed to take as much delight as Jenna did in Adam’s approval, but she was more straightforward about showing it. �I did Jenna’s hair, too. Look.’ She tugged at one of Jenna’s curls.

�Maybe I’ll just fix it back up again.’ Jenna gathered her hair behind her head, looking for the elastic tie that Ellie had discarded somewhere on the floor. She’d never quite got around to liking her hair much. Too many memories of her mother tugging mercilessly at the tangles and bemoaning the fact that it wasn’t smooth like her sister’s. And that, horror of horrors, it was red.

�Don’t.’ Something about Adam’s tone made her freeze, stock still. �It really suits you like that.’ There was no indication in his face that this was anything other than a polite compliment.

Rob came to her rescue again. Friendly, open and perfectly unmoved by the intensity of Adam’s voice. �Yeah. Fiery, eh, Jen? Doesn’t take any nonsense from anyone.’ He gave Adam a pointed look and held his hand out to Ellie. �Come on, then. If we’re going, let’s go.’

�Flame-haired.’ Rob missed Adam’s quiet comment in the kerfuffle of getting Ellie out of the door and down the stairs, but Jenna caught it, as she guessed she had been meant to. She shot him a glare and he grinned innocently, as if he’d meant nothing by it. Maybe he hadn’t.

�So what’s the story with Julie, then?’ Adam had waited until Rob had taken Ellie home and he and Jenna were sitting alone in the open-air enclosure on the pavement outside the restaurant.

�Julie? You mean Julie Taylor?’

�Yes. Her consultant, Iain Simms, emailed me on Friday evening, copying you in.’

�Oh. I haven’t had time to look at my email for the last couple of days.’ He was making her feel self-conscious again. His eyes had wandered towards her far too many times already, cool, assessing, as if he was sizing her up, and Jenna couldn’t help wondering what he saw. Wishing that it wasn’t what she saw in the mirror. Pale limbs, untouched by the sun. A slim waist, but precious few curves. Red hair.

If he noticed her agitation, he paid no heed to it, leaning forward across the table towards her. �Too busy dragging furniture and boxes around, eh?’

Actually, yes. Those golden eyes were far too perceptive for Jenna’s liking. And she didn’t want him to see the effect they had on her when she met his gaze. �Shall we walk?’ Walking seemed a better option than sitting here, staring straight at him.

�If you like.’ He stretched his arms, flexing his shoulder as if it was stiff, and signalled for the bill. �Along the river? Somehow the river always makes me feel as if I’m home again.’

Jenna nodded. The pavement to one side of them dipped and meandered its way down to the south bank of the Thames. Tower Bridge was in the distance to the right. The footbridge to their left, with a stream of Sunday afternoon day-trippers dawdling their way across the river. �I’ve never been away long enough to have that feeling of coming home. I’d like to travel. Learn a little about life.’

�You don’t need a plane ticket to learn about life.’ His eyes focussed somewhere else for a moment, as if he was straining to catch a last glimpse of the place he had left behind. �Let’s walk. I’ll tell you what Iain’s email said.’

They strolled together down the broad steps that led to the river path. He was all sun-drenched charm, relaxed grace, and Jenna allowed herself to wonder what it would be like to walk arm in arm with him. She gave herself twenty seconds to feel the warmth of his body next to hers and then consigned the fantasy to the breeze that blew in from the river.

�So I guess we’ll be working together on this one.’

�Uh?’ If she’d been listening then she would know what they were working together on. �You mean you’re going to be working at the hospital? As well as lecturing?’

The slight twitch of his eyebrow told her that he’d already said that. �Yeah. Iain’s asked me to work with him on a few specific cases. I’m also working down in A and E for one or two days a week, while Dr Bryant’s on paternity leave. I’m hoping to get the chance to observe some of the techniques and practices you employ.’

�And teach us a thing or two as well?’ The idea of being observed for any length of time by those amber eyes was … well, it would be interesting, if nothing else.

�Yes. That too. I do have something to offer in return.’

�I’m sure you do.’ Jenna wasn’t even going to think about what Adam had to offer. �So why your particular interest in Julie? We’re hoping that she won’t need much reconstructive surgery.’

�It’s not all about surgery.’ He grinned down at Jenna. �Iain suggested that since you’ve been visiting her every day, I should speak to you about her.’

�Well, I only really know about her case in a general sense. I saw Julie when she came into A and E after she was the victim of an acid attack. She saw it coming and shielded her face, but she has burns on her arm and shoulder. Iain and his team are dealing with that, though I’m really more concerned about her emotional state.’

�Which is where I come in.’

Jenna turned to him in surprise. There was nothing in his face, no clue of what he was thinking. As she stared, a small muscle at the side of his jaw broke free of his control and began to flicker. �You know something about trauma?’

He knew something all right. That muscle was going crazy. �I do. Many of my patients are in the same position as Julie, and I try to deal with that as well as their physical needs.’

Jenna narrowed her eyes. �And there’s no counselling help? In Florida?’

He seemed to relax a little. �I work for a charity. We work all over South America, bringing medical aid and surgery to poor communities. Florida’s our home base. We have a facility there where patients who need specialised care are brought.’

�So …’ Embarrassment trickled down the back of her neck and made her shiver. She’d misjudged Adam.

�So what?’ It appeared he wasn’t going to let her off the hook.

�I thought …’ She heaved a sigh. She might as well spit it out. �When you said plastic surgery and Florida, I thought you meant nip and tuck.’

�Ah.’ Amusement sounded in his voice. �No, I mostly deal with cleft lips, cleft palates, facial tumours, injuries. Mostly children and teenagers, some adults. I imagine the rich and famous expect their surgeons to turn up to work in something other than ripped jeans and a T-shirt.’

Jenna swallowed hard. He would be eye-catching enough in pretty much anything, and she didn’t want to even think about ripped jeans. His neat chinos and plain, casual shirt were quite enough for the time being. �Then I owe you an apology. Your work sounds amazing.’

�It has its rewards.’ The warmth in his face told Jenna that those rewards weren’t measured in pounds and pence. �Many of my patients are traumatised, either from their injuries or from having been mocked or shunned because of their appearance. I told Iain that I was especially interested in seeing how that was dealt with here.’

Jenna shrugged. �That’s just the trouble. Julie won’t see a counsellor.’

�So I hear. I also hear that she trusts you and that you’ve been doing your best to fulfil that role for her.’ He fixed her with an enquiring look. �Not a particularly easy path to tread. Difficult not to become over-involved, I imagine.’

Jenna pressed her lips together and he shrugged as if he had already proved his point. �My lecture starts in an hour. Would you like to come?’

�I might just do that. Were you thinking of covering trauma?’

�I was considering touching on the fact that a small team with limited resources needs to take a more holistic approach.’

�In other words you need to treat the person, not just the injury.’ It was a private dream of Jenna’s. Not just to be a doctor but to be a healer. �Difficult not to become over-involved, then.’

A smile spread slowly across his face. �I’m going to have to take the Fifth on that.’

�If you do that, the jury’s going to assume that the answer’s yes.’

�Nothing I can do about that. They can assume whatever they like.’ For a moment Jenna thought that she had broken through his reserve. Then the fire died in his eyes. �I’ll drop in and see Julie tomorrow.’

Jenna nodded. He wasn’t making a request and she supposed that she was going to be stuck with his input, whatever that might be. She may as well accept it gracefully. �I’d be interested to hear what you think. You know where to find me.’

�I do.’ He looked at his watch. �It’s time I headed over to the lecture theatre. Will you fill me in on some more of Julie’s details on the way?’

It was the dream that had haunted him for the last eighteen months, sometimes once every week or two, sometimes every night. He woke up with a stifled cry, icy sweat against his cheek. For a moment, he couldn’t work out where he was, and then the dim glow of the nightlight brought him to his senses. The muslin drapes, drawn across the half-open French doors, fluttered in the night breeze and he slowly got out of bed, shaking his head, trying to reclaim his place in the waking world.

Slipping outside onto the moss-lined stones of the patio, he took a deep draught of air, inhaling the smell of the city, mingling with the softer scents of the garden. He started, instinctively drawing back into the shadows, as a sharp click sounded above his head.

Jenna had opened the door, which led on to an iron railed balcony above his head, and was standing beside the steps that snaked down to the patio, just a few feet away from where he stood. In the darkness Adam could see only that she wore something loose, swirling around her bare feet, and that her hair was a wild shadow around her head.

He held his breath. She was leaning over the balcony, craning round towards him, and he guessed that she could see the open French doors and the light inside. Adam flattened himself against the wall and watched as she seemed to sniff the air, like some shy, nocturnal creature of the forest.

A fox trotted across the lawn. Her head jerked upwards and she followed its progress, waiting until it had disappeared into the shrubbery before she turned and slowly walked back into the house. Adam heard the catch on the door being fastened and then there was silence.

He swiped his hand across his face. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day, and he should try to sleep again. The thought that she was there, perhaps even watching over him, calmed him. Tomorrow would be time enough to probe the intriguing contradictions of his flame-haired, disturbingly gorgeous landlady.




CHAPTER THREE


�LOOK, she’s here now.’ Julie’s face lit up into a grin and Adam turned to see Jenna entering the ward. Red hair, bound tightly at the back of her head, white shirt and dark slacks. Even in such severe attire she looked like an angel. Not one of those sweet, dimpled ones, looking down dispassionately from the safety of a cloud. She was a warrior angel, the kind you’d really like to have on your side when things got tough, who rushed in where everyone else feared to tread and plucked you out of danger.

�She comes every lunchtime, does she?’ Adam knew that she did. Iain had already told him that.

�Yes. Just for half an hour. Sometimes less.’ There was a hint of resentment in Julie’s voice and Adam reflected just how precious that time was for Jenna. A snatched half-hour when most of the A and E staff were happy just to grab a sandwich and get their breath for a few minutes.

Before he had time to answer, Jenna was at the foot of the bed, her fingers grasping the rail where Julie’s notes hung. �Hi, there.’ She was all smiles. �How are you, then? You’re looking better.’

Julie flashed her a grin. �Yeah, I feel better. That other doctor says I’m doing okay. They’ve got the pain control sorted now.’

�Good.’ Jenna’s gaze caught Adam’s and he basked in its warmth for a moment before her attention was back on Julie. �I see you’ve met Dr Sinclair.’

�Yes.’ Julie turned her wide blue eyes on to Adam. �He’s going to monitor my progress.’

Jenna’s face lit up. She looked a great deal more enthusiastic about it than she had the other day but, then, she’d obviously enjoyed his lecture, questioning him about it all the way home. �Really? That’s good. You’ve made plenty already.’

�Suppose so.’ A porter wheeled a squeaking trolley into the ward and Julie flinched. Adam remembered that reaction all too clearly. All your senses on red alert, every moment of the day. Alarm at any sudden noise.

Jenna had leaned forward, her hand tapping Julie’s foot gently. �Hey. Earth to Julie. It’s okay, honey, just a porter.’

�Yeah. Just a porter.’ Julie’s eyes filled with tears and Jenna’s helpless gaze flipped to Adam.

�Listen, Julie, these feelings are natural.’ Adam repeated what he’d been told so many times. �It will pass. You just have to hang in there until it does.’

�When?’ Julie almost spat the word at him. �When will it pass?’ Adam recognised that sudden, volatile fury too. As if his heart was already full to the brim with anger, and only a drop more would make it spill over.

�I can’t tell you. There are ways we can help you …’ Adam tailed off as Julie turned her head away from him. He was losing her.

�What do you want, Julie?’ Jenna’s voice cut across the space between them. �Dr Sinclair can lie to you if you like. Give you a time and a date when everything will be back as it was. Or he can respect you enough to tell you the truth.’

The warrior was back. The woman who took life by the shoulders and shook hard until she got what she wanted. Adam grinned and took Jenna’s cue. �I could lie. Do you want me to?’

�Of course not.’ Julie shot an imploring look at Jenna. �But it’s all so much talk, isn’t it?’

Adam saw Jenna’s knuckles whiten as she gripped the rail at the end of the bed. She’d done a good job with Julie. She’d gained her trust, and she’d used it to help Iain and the other doctors do their work. But she’d hit a brick wall here.

Unless … Adam hadn’t planned on this, but the agonised look in Jenna’s eyes spurred him on. �That’s what I thought when the doctors said that to me. So they sent me to a counsellor and I didn’t believe her either. In the end you have to find out for yourself.’

He had Julie’s attention. Jenna’s too, only she was trying not to look at him with such overt interest as Julie. �What do you know about it?’

�I’ve been there. Not in the same way as you, but I think I understand part of what you’re feeling. I was shot, and ended up in hospital in Florida.’

Julie’s eyes were as round as saucers. �Like on TV?’

Jenna huffed quietly. �No, it’s not the same as on TV, Julie …’ Adam waved her to silence. Now wasn’t the time for her to spring to his defence, however much it pleased him to hear her do it.

�The thing is that being shot changed my view of the world. Before, I’d thought that I was pretty much unbreakable, but I realised that I wasn’t. I had to relearn how to do the smallest things without panicking. But I did, which is how I know that you can. And that you will.’

Julie stared at him, and then gave him a curt nod. Slowly, her eyes left his face and focussed on Jenna. �Did you bring me some chocolate?’

Jenna reached into her pocket and held up a pound coin. �It’s in the machine if you want it. Dr Sinclair will come with us, it’s right outside the doors of the ward.’

Julie fingered the blanket that lay over her legs. �I don’t want to disturb my skin grafts.’

�You won’t.’ Adam tapped the thick file that he had brought with him. �I’ve read all of your notes and the skin grafts have taken nicely. You can get up and move around gently now. In fact, it’ll be good for you, stimulate the circulation.’

Julie wrinkled her nose. �They look horrible. I’ve seen them when they do the dressings.’

�I know.’ He fingered the envelope he had tucked inside the file, wondering whether now was the time to bring it out. �They’ll look better. You know that, don’t you?’

�Yeah. S’pose so.’ Julie huffed a sigh. �Every day, in every way it just gets better and better, is that it?’

Adam suppressed a grin. He could see why Jenna had taken to Julie. Underneath all that teenage petulance the kid had spirit. �Well, yeah. Some days are always going to be better than others, but if you look at it in the long term, things do get better.’ He was getting there. He got a grin in return. �You look better when you smile, you know.’

�Yeah, I’ve heard that one before too.’

Adam came to a decision and pulled the envelope he had brought out of the file. �I brought you a picture. One of my patients, I treated her for burns.’

Julie focussed on the envelope. �So I’m supposed to look at this and see how much progress she’s made, am I?’ Petulant and bright. Adam could see why Julie was such a handful.

�I had a lot of fears when I was hurt. A lot of feelings that I couldn’t come to terms with.’ The look on Julie’s face told Adam that she did, too. �So did the girl in the picture. It’s a tough road, but sometimes knowing that you’re not walking it alone makes it a bit easier.’

He was delving much deeper into his own pain than he’d expected to. But somehow, with Jenna sitting quietly beside him, and Julie, whose need was so much greater than his own, it felt okay. Almost a relief.

�Okay. I’ll look.’ Julie reached for the photograph, struggling to get it out of the envelope with just one hand. Jenna didn’t move to help her. Tough love. But it was love, all the same, the kind that was going to haul Julie through this, kicking and screaming if necessary.

Jenna craned over to see the photograph. �Who’s the boy that she’s with?’

�That’s Rick. They’re married now.’

Jenna exchanged looks with Julie. �He’s nice. I think he’s more of a Ricky than a Rick, don’t you?’

Julie giggled. �Yeah. Pretty neat guy.’

It wasn’t exactly textbook stuff, but it was working. The last thing that Julie was seeing were the faint scars on Claudia’s leg. She was seeing a young woman, happy and in love, her handsome boyfriend at her side. Jenna worked round to the scars, but only after she’d made her point about Rick not caring about them. Adam’s hand strayed absently to his shoulder. She was almost making him feel better.

�Can you make me a copy of this?’ Julie regarded Adam, obviously assessing his age and likely technical competence. �Do you know how to do that?’

�I’ve got a copy. Take this.’

�So you like the younger man, do you?’ All the way down to the canteen, Adam had been smiling at something, and that was obviously it.

�Oh, go boil your head.’ Jenna stuffed her take-away sandwich into his hand while she rummaged in her bag for her purse, then grabbed the sandwich back again. She wasn’t best pleased with him, but tact prevented Jenna from challenging him here and now on the matter.

He shot her a puzzled look and her exasperation began to cool. Not before he’d noticed it, though. �Want to talk about it?’ Before she could stop him, he’d taken her sandwich back, showing it to the cashier and then walking away with it to a quiet spot in the far corner of the canteen.

As soon as she reached the table where he was sitting, she made a lunge for the sandwich, but he was too quick for her, holding it out of her reach. �So you’re going to starve me into submission now, are you?’

�If necessary.’

�I do have money, you know. I can go and get another one.’ Jenna plumped herself down on the chair opposite.

�You’re not going to, though.’

She probably shouldn’t have shown her hand by sitting down. �No. I’m not.’ He pushed her sandwich across the table towards her with one finger, and Jenna took possession of it. �You might have told me about being shot. That you know about trauma first hand.’ She lowered her voice, hissing the words across the table at him.

�I might have done.’ He rubbed thoughtfully at his shoulder. �I would have done, if I’d known that I was going to tell Julie.’

�That’s not the point. Do you really think that you’re best placed to help her if you’ve still got issues of your own to deal with?’

�Who says that I do?’

The look in his eyes, for a start. And Jenna was sure that she’d not been mistaken when she’d thought she’d heard his stifled cry last night. Even though she hadn’t seen him, she’d sensed his presence out on the patio. �Well, do you?’

�Not where Julie’s concerned. I have it under control.’ Maybe he saw the disbelief in her eyes. �If you want to know, you should just ask. Rob drives me crazy, tiptoeing around what happened as if it’s some guilty secret.’

�Well, tact never was Rob’s strong point.’ She got a grin in response. �I would like to know, but the canteen’s probably not the best place in the world to have this conversation.’ Jenna looked around awkwardly.

�It’s okay. My fiancée and I were both shot eighteen months ago in Guatemala, in a roadside ambush that went bad. Elena died, and I pulled through. I struggled with it, for a long time.’

The mixed emotions jostling in her chest drained away, leaving only horror and shock. �Adam, I’m so sorry.’

He slid his hand across the table towards hers, as if he should be the one to comfort her. �It happened and I won’t say that it hasn’t changed me. But I’d never let it compromise the welfare of any patient.’

�No.’ Her fingers were trembling, and she pressed them down onto the tabletop to steady them. �I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have insinuated that.’

�But I still should have told you?’

�Yes, I think you should.’

He nodded. �So do I. And I want you to promise me something.’

Anything. She’d do anything she could to help him. �Okay.’

�If you ever think that a personal issue is getting in the way of my treatment of a patient, you’ll tell me. I don’t mean dropped hints or concerned noises, but words of one syllable.’

�I can do that. I’m better at words of one syllable than I am at hints.’

He grinned. �Thought you might be.’ He looked at his watch. �As we’re here, do you have time for some coffee?’

�Yes, of course.’ Those honest eyes of his. Never once countenancing pity, but demanding respect. Jenna could almost feel them drawing her in, inch by inch. �I’ve another twenty minutes of my lunch break left, and they’ll page me if they need me.’ He went to stand and she beat him to it. �Stay there, I’ll get them.’

Things were beginning to make sense. He’d papered over the cracks of his own trauma so effectively that it only surfaced at night when he couldn’t suppress it with an effort of will. And by the time Jenna returned with the coffee, setting his cup down in front of him, he had already moved on and was thinking about something else.

�Acid’s a very personal way to attack someone.’

�It was personal. Kind of.’ Jenna tipped some milk into his cup. �Julie has a sister, a year older than her. They’re very alike, could be twins. She’d borrowed her sister’s blouse and jacket to go out in.’

�And the acid was meant for her sister?’

�Yes. An ex-boyfriend who held a grudge. The parents knew there was a problem there, and had been keeping an eye on Julie’s sister.’

�And no one thought to stop Julie from going out dressed in her sister’s clothes?’ Anger suffused every line of his face.

�Easy to be wise after the event. I’ve talked to the parents and put in an urgent request for counselling for Julie’s sister, but she’s not at the top of the priority list.’

He sighed, his finger and thumb massaging the bridge of his nose. �Do you think it would help if you and I had an informal chat with the whole family?’

Jenna turned the idea over in her head, and decided to trust him. �Yeah. Yes, I think that would help a lot.’

He’d seemed glad of her company over coffee, and almost relieved when Jenna had steered the conversation round to lighter topics. Relaxed now, he strolled with her all the way back down to A and E, staying to chat to Jenna’s colleague Brenda while Jenna went to the locker room. And he was still there when she returned.

�I saw penguins last year when I went to New Zealand. I wasn’t too keen on the little blighters but my friend was mad to see them.’ Brenda’s blond hair, piled up on the top of her head in a messy confection of highlights and low-lights, was shining, along with her smile.

�Yeah?’ Brenda had caught Adam’s interest and he hardly noticed Jenna’s return. �I’d love to go to New Zealand.’

�Great place. We stopped off in Hong Kong on the way.’ Brenda was a seasoned traveller, saving her money and her annual leave for somewhere far-flung every summer. �I’m planning to go to India this year.’

His arms were folded on the counter in front of him and he leaned forward towards Brenda. �Are you? Whereabouts?’

Brenda had his full attention now and they were swapping stories about places they’d been, things they’d seen. Jenna didn’t have much to contribute to that conversation. Sure, she got itchy feet from time to time, who didn’t? But her yearning to see the world had been smothered by the need for security, her home, her career. One day, maybe, she’d have that sufficiently sorted to venture out a little.

�Tell him to come along, Jen.’ Brenda was nudging her elbow.

�Uh? Where?’ She’d lost track, reckoning that Brenda and Adam were doing fine on their own.

�To the softball match next Friday evening.’ Brenda turned her attention back to Adam. �All the hospitals have teams, and we have a kind of league. We’re playing the Marylebone Medics, and they take it all very seriously, you know, practising and not drinking beer until afterwards.’ Brenda’s eye assessed the full breadth of Adam’s shoulders with something more than professional interest. �I bet you’re pretty handy with a bat. We might just stand a chance if I can persuade Rob to play as well.’

�Where do you play?’ Adam seemed to be weighing up the offer.

�Hyde Park. Over in the southern section, there’s always plenty of room on the sports field to stake a pitch. Our team’s the Bankside Cheetahs—because we cheat, not because we resemble a graceful, fast-moving animal.’ Brenda giggled. �Although Jenna has her moments.’

�Right. Like last month when I tripped over your foot.’

�That was just unlucky. Anyway, we’re never too proud to welcome a ringer on to the team.’

�I work here. Part time for the next month, anyway.’

�Oh, well, that’s even better.’ Brenda was scenting victory. �I thought you were lecturing at the university. They’ve got their own team but you don’t want to be with that lot. Far too young and enthusiastic.’

Adam chuckled. �I’m filling in with a couple of shifts a week here, as well as working with the reconstructive surgery team.’ He grinned. �We’re all sharing knowledge. So, assuming that I’m old and cynical enough for the Bankside Cheetahs, I’m totally legit.’

�Well, that’s sorted, then.’ Brenda turned her green eyes on to him, full force. �I was wondering what that orange circle on the roster was. Stands for knowledge-sharing, does it?’

�Guess so.’ Adam glanced at his watch. �But since I’m supposed to be sharing elsewhere today, I’d better make myself scarce.’ He gifted Brenda with a devastating smile and nodded at Jenna. �Later.’

Brenda watched Adam through the automatic doors, chewing speculatively on the end of her pencil. �How did it go with Julie?’

�Good. He really got through to her. And he was honest with her, didn’t treat her as if she was stupid, just because she’s young. From what I saw of his case notes at the lecture yesterday, he’s an exceptional surgeon.’

�Praise indeed.’ Brenda shot a querying glance towards Reception and received a signal that all was quiet. �So you’re practically living with him. What’s the story, any lady visitors?’

�Give him a chance, he’s only been here two days.’ Jenna could see exactly where this conversation was headed. �You interested, then?’

Brenda shrugged. �Don’t want to step on anyone’s toes.’

Jenna shrugged. There was no reason why he shouldn’t be dating again. She doubted that Adam was short on offers.

�I wouldn’t know. You’ll have to ask him. Or Rob, he’d probably know.’

�I didn’t mean that.’ Brenda was looking at her pointedly.

�Me?’ Jenna flushed, shaking her head. �What are you, mad?’

�What’s wrong with that? He’s good-looking, seems like a nice guy. Unless you’ve still got an arrangement with Joe …?’

�Joe? He’s been gone nearly a year now.’

Brenda pursed her lips. �I thought that maybe you were waiting for him or something. You two did seem very cosy right before he left. Didn’t strike me as if it was the end of the road somehow.’

Cosy was not the word for it. It had been more like agonised prayer on Jenna’s part that a miracle would happen and he wouldn’t leave. Or that he’d want her to go with him to Australia. Something, anything other than the harsh reality that he’d just felt like a change of scene and she wasn’t included in his future plans.

�No. We split up for good.’

�I’m sorry. I didn’t realise, Jen, you seemed so okay with it all that I thought that you two had worked something out.’ Realisation dawned on Brenda’s face. �But you were just playing nice, weren’t you?’

Jenna shrugged away the hurt. It had been the same when her parents had left, easier to pretend that she didn’t care and just get on with her life. �Joe’s ancient history. And Adam’s not my type.’

�I would have thought he was pretty much anyone’s type.’ Brenda shot her a suspicious look. �But, then, he’s not around for long, is he.’

�Exactly. Having one boyfriend leave the country is bad luck. Two looks like carelessness.’ Add her parents to the list and it was criminal negligence. Jenna swallowed the thought and grinned at Brenda. �I could ask you round some time if you’re interested, though.’

The idea seemed to appeal to Brenda, but she shook her head. �No. You know me, I don’t run after men. Always better to let them come to you.’

Fair enough. On the evidence of his reactions, Adam might just do that. Brenda was good-hearted, pretty and she knew how to have a good time. No tangled strings. No stupid hang-ups. Just as long as he remembered to close the French doors at night, if he did decide to take Brenda up on the offer that Jenna reckoned she was pretty much certain to make.




CHAPTER FOUR


IT was his fourth night in the flat, and the fourth night in a row that the dream had come. He guessed that it was the change of scene that had brought the dreams back so often. So vividly. Adam gritted his teeth and got on with it. Get out of bed. Shake the dream off. Walk a little and then go back to bed and hope that this time his sleep was untroubled.

The dream clung to him as if he had fallen into a pit of stinking mud. Maybe his talk with Julie and her family that afternoon hadn’t helped. It had gone well, but he hadn’t been able to get the haunted look in Julie’s sister’s eyes out of his head.

He padded through to the kitchen and got himself a glass of water, drinking it down in one go. Throwing on jeans and an old T-shirt, he slipped noiselessly through the open French doors and onto the patio to get some air.

�Okay?’ Her voice sounded above him, making him jump. Adam wondered whether any of the cries that had sounded through his dream had been real and had woken her.

�Yeah. Warm night again.’

�Yes. I can’t sleep.’ They both skirted carefully around the real reason for Adam’s wakefulness. And perhaps for hers. He’d heard the click of the balcony doors above him more than once these past couple of nights.

Adam sat down on the wide steps of the fire escape. �Join me?’ It was probably a bad idea, but he couldn’t help himself. He’d seen her often enough over the last couple of days, but she had seemed remote, less willing to connect with him, and it had chilled him to the marrow.

Her footsteps were silent behind him, but he felt the silky material of her dressing gown brush against his arm as she walked down the steps and sat down next to him. She smelled just lovely. Like an English country garden after a downpour of rain, sweet and clean, with a touch of the deep scent of the earth.

�Is this why you wouldn’t stay with Rob and Cassie?’ Her voice was quiet, measured. Soothing, like the dark stillness of the night. �They wouldn’t have minded, you know.’

�I do.’ The hairs on the back of his wrist were standing on end where the silky material had touched him. The brief sensation had almost made him cry out.

�For Ellie and Daisy?’

�Yeah. The drawing that Ellie did …’

Her soft laugh echoed through his empty heart. �That was beautiful. Bright colours, smiley faces. It didn’t seem like a sad picture to me.’

�To me either. A year ago, six months even, I couldn’t have looked at it without breaking down. But now it makes me smile. Elena would have loved it.’ He shifted a little, working at the tension across his shoulders. �This … The dreams aren’t for Ellie to know about, though. They’re something different.’

�How?’

All he’d wanted these past few days had been for her to challenge him, help him break free of the shackles that were stopping him from doing what all his instincts clamoured for. He’d asked her to be honest with him, speak plainly, and she had. But it wasn’t enough.

�I don’t want to go there, Jenna.’

He felt her shrink away from him. �I’m sorry. Fools rush in …’

He was suddenly so sick of this. Sick of the complex dance they’d been doing, never getting too close but unable to keep their distance. �Angels don’t fear anything.’

�I wish I could take a leaf out of their book.’

Maybe he should too. Act as if he was on the side of the angels. Pretend that what he’d told her already was all there was to it, and that there wasn’t another part of him that had been irrevocably broken that day on the road.

�Perhaps they should take one from yours.’

She laughed quietly into the moonlight, shaking her head. �I don’t think so somehow.’

Something whispered against his arm, feather soft. The wings of a moth, maybe, or one of the butterflies from her garden, out on a late-night spree. Or maybe it had been a lock of her hair.

�You underestimate yourself. You can teach them a thing or two.’ He dipped in a little closer and found that her lips were already there. Euphoria swamped the voice of reason. It would just be one kiss. A man didn’t have to fall in love, risk everything again, just for one kiss.

If she’d have stayed still, quiet, maybe he could have resisted her. But he felt her fingers on his jaw, skimming across the night’s stubble. Then she whispered his name, and ripped every last thread of his resolve to tatters.

His hands found her waist and she slid onto his lap. He kissed her, heat banking and flaring in his chest until his head began to swim.

�Mmm. That was foolish.’ Her lips brushed warmly against his, full of the promise of what he hadn’t yet tasted.

�Very.’ If the first kiss could be explained away as a heat-of-the-moment thing, the second trashed that particular excuse. They both knew exactly what they were doing. Her gaze locked with his and he was lost, drowning in the deep blue waters of her eyes. Adam poured everything he had, everything he was into the kiss, letting the long, slow beat of their passion take him.

Finally, he let his lips slip from hers and he held her gently to his chest, not caring that she could surely hear the urgent pumping of his heart. She was silent for a long time and when she did speak her voice was almost a whisper. �Adam, I …’

He rested his cheek against her hair. �I know. The most foolish things can be the sweetest.’

She laughed quietly and he was glad that he had pleased her. �Got a little carried away, I guess.’

She knew it wasn’t only that just as well as he did. But Adam already cared about her too much to short-change her by taking this any further. �Yes. Something about a hot summer night. Jenna, I’m sorry if …’

�It’s okay. I know.’ She hung her head, moving to get up off his lap, but he pulled her down. He may not be able to take this any further, but he wouldn’t have her believe what she so obviously seemed to think.

�When I kissed you, Jenna, it was you that I wanted. Just you.’

She gnawed at her lip uncertainly, seeming to be unable to take that fact in. Reality was closing back in on both of them, wrenching them apart, but he couldn’t let her go without knowing that these last moments had been special. He dropped a kiss onto the end of his finger, pressing it against her lips, and felt them curve in a smile.

�I suppose I’d better go. Before either of us starts anything we can’t finish.’ She didn’t move from his lap.

�That would be best.’ He’d committed himself once to a woman. But that was when he had believed in love without loss. And he had a ready-made excuse not to take this any further. �I’m only here for a month and then I have to leave.’

�I know.’ She seemed almost relieved, as if that had settled some conflict that was going on in her head. A flash of mischief crossed her face. �Great kiss, though.’

�Yeah. One of the best.’ The best, as far as he could remember, but saying that would only get him into more trouble than he was already in.

Wordlessly she jumped to her feet, almost running past him and up the steps of the fire escape. Seconds later the click of the door catch above him told him that she had gone straight inside.




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